ninja fashion show?

i used to believe that i was in control of things that happened in my life. things don’t just happen to me. not all the time anyway.
however, when the stars align, venus is flying over the moon, or a certain ladyfriend decides to be in cahoots with my roommate, then the result is most of my underwear screen printed with ninjas.

updates

it's been a hot minute. how did i let the whole month of may pass (finally!) without a single entry? but it's june! and definitely summer.

these things have happened in my life:
1. may 17th: irene and sheep got married! and gallivanted through europe for their honeymoon. i successfully wore a strapless bridesmaid's dress for 12 hours and didn't trip once during the wedding. however, i did sport a very disastrous series of tank top tan lines. whatevs.

fortunately, irene gave me the option of taking care of my hair and i didn't have to get hair done in chinatown which would've involved lots of hairspray and a more shellacked look (not my style, clearly). unfortunately, she did not give me the same option with the makeup. a brief conversation with the makeup artist post makeup application went as such...
makeup artist: you don't wear makeup on the regular, do you?
f00: pffffft, nooo.
makeup artist: ok, well, i wouldn't suggest looking in the mirror then.
f00: gasp.
makeup artist: i mean, you don't look like a clown or anything. but it might be kind of a shock to you. also, no eating or drinking the rest of the day.
i thought she was joking and was going to laugh until i realized she wasn't. sweet.
judith was my hot date (and 1 of 4 non-asian people at the 150 person event) and we cleared the dance floor at dinner when we slow danced to al green’s "let’s stay together". that was perhaps the most priceless portion of the evening. that and taking 4 containers’ worth of delicious almond roca.
also, consistent with being the crazy fools that we are, we decided that it would be best to drive home immediately after the wedding. i think the jus secretly wanted to play NPR sunday puzzles (podcast style with will shortz) real bad. we rolled into baltimore at approximately 4.30 am sunday morning. a tad smarter.

2. memorial day weekend: we planted a fruit and vegetable garden in the jus’ backyard – peppers, watermelon, sweet peas, tomatoes, carrots, broccoli! things are sprouting and i can’t wait to harvest wonderfulness.

3. june 2nd: 3 wisdom teeth extracted and i took the whole week off to recover (please, no more pudding). felt nauseous, briefly, then spent some quality time with friends the rest of the week. watched the sex and the city movie with judith and hannah. i'm secretly some derivative of a gay male. therefore i liked it.

4. june 6th: donated blood at the arc for the first time ever in support of jessica grace xander, the arc’s all-star. during the confidential screening process (which included a free HIV test), the lady asked me a series of personal information questions. i was answering all of them accurately when she asked:
lady: gender?
f00’s brain: shouldn’t that be obvious?
f00: effff.
lady enters the information.
lady: so we’re registering you as female, correct?
f00’s brain: what the effff?
f00: yes.
does she think i just have very beefy and awesome pectoral muscles?